A co-worker (let's call him Hank) and I arrived at the airport about
an hour before our flight was supposed to leave only to find out that
our flight was delayed by 3 hours. Great... in Tampa and with nothing
to do, where should we go?  Heh... "let's get something to eat down at
Ybor City and then hit maybe a strip club or two".  Well, one drink
led to another and before we knew it, we had to get back to the
airport and didn't get a chance to hit any of the clubs. Damn! Those
Amaretto Sours, Long Island Ice Teas and Mudslides were good though. 

Anyway, as we get back inside Tampa International, we notice that our
flight had been delayed again for another hour!  No way... Here we
were, buzzed and horny, stuck at the Tampa airport. Hank is checking
out the local talent. Ever notice that airports attract a large
percentage of hot gals that dress fairly slutty?  I love it. Maybe
I'll have to moonlight at the local airport after I get my DJ job
straightened out. Okay, back to the story. Anyway, he spots this hot
blonde walking towards us and as she passes us, I get this whiff of
her perfume.  Victoria Secret Raspberry. I look at Hank and say,
"She's a stripper." It was in the way she walked, the way she looked,
her shoes, and most importantly, that scent. He looks at me and is
like, "no way... ya right, I don't think so."   We ogle some more
women and finally head towards the terminal.

"I can't believe this!! I've missed my connection, my ride,
everything!!!", screams the hot blonde we saw earlier. My buddy Hank
goes up behind her and adds for support, "Yah, ya, me too! I can't
believe this!!  I'm gonna go get a drink!!  Do you want to join us?"
She looks at both of us, looks back at the wide-eyed Delta service
person, and goes, "Ya, I need a drink, let's go!"  "Hi, my name is
LMR, and this is Hank."  "My name is Beth (and yes, of course it's
been changed)."

So off to the bar we go. TGIFriday's was our target and on our way
there, we have some light conversation. She asks us what we do and
what we're doing in Tampa and continues about how she hates it here
because there's not much to do on the weeknights. "Tampa guys are
goofballs", she says as Hank and I chuckle. Uh huh. "So what do you
do?", Hank asks her.  "Oh, I'm down here to help open a club."
Bwahahahaha... I look at Hank and he KNOWS I was right at this point.
My earlier comment must have been ringing in his ears. "So, you came
to open [Club Name] huh?", I say.  At first she had kind of a shocked
look on her face, but she took it in stride and continued without a
pause, "Ya, I'm doing the owners a favor, they needed me down here".
"So how long have you worked for so-and-so?", I ask her... it just so
happens I knew a lot of the people she knew. What a small world.
Anyway, at this point, Hank is confused at how I know all these people
she knew and I was wheeling trying to figure out what to tell Hank.
Afterall, he had no idea of my ASSC persona. So I told him it was part
of an old job which did a lot of promo work with the clubs. Okay, not
exactly in the right timeframe, but it worked. 

We drink quite a bit as we chat the hours away. 3 more Margaritas on
the rocks, doubles please. Heck, we had plenty of them to get rid of
at this point as the flight got delayed ANOTHER hour! Geez, we weren't
even sure if we were gonna be able to leave Tampa that evening.  My
buddy was just amazed that this dancer was so normal. Well, as normal
as you can get while waiting for an airplane at Tampa International
Airport I guess. I was laughing. I guess I was close to drunk. Anyway,
about an hour before our flight was to leave, we took Beth down to the
Delta counter and demanded she be upgraded to first class since they
had made her miss her connection, her ride, etc. He asked to look at
my ticket and Bada-Bing, Seat 2B. Right next to me. I don't think my
buddy was too happy considering he was in 6C. So we board the plane
and finally leave at around 1:30am on flight 807 which was supposed to
leave at 6pm.

Beth was a wonderful conversationalist. She knew her industry and knew
it well. She started young and had seen enough to know where she
wanted to go. As a matter of fact, she was about to get her masters
from a big name school out here in the west coast this May. But of
course, with my perverted mind, we start talking about strip clubs,
and laps, and mileage. All kinds of stuff that she was quite amazed I
understood. I blamed it on ASSC. So I asked her where the strangest
place she had ever lapped someone. She started mentioning a few
places... I stopped her. NO, not places where you had sex with
someone, LAPPED someone!  She thought about it and was amazed that she
had never just lapped somebody outside a club. I was laughing, she was
giggling, we were quite buzzed. Two Vodka Cranberries please. I think
the movie had been running about 15 minutes when she hopped over to
2A. "I gotta do this, move your leg over more, there..", she whispers.
I look around the cabin. The couple to the right of us are asleep. I
can't see Hank. WAIT! Hold on... I put my headset on and had her do
the same. Channel 8. Works for me, it's kinda slow and has a beat. She
actually started to lap me!! Heck, I gotta fly first class more often!
We played around a bit more and I watched the stewardess walk by and
give us a funny look. But hey, she didn't say one word. After about
1/2 hour, we were both laughing like crazy and I think we woke up a
few people. I felt kind of bad for Hank so I told Beth I was going to
switch seats with him so he could have someone to talk to. She just
gave me this smirk. 

"Hey Hank, wake up, switch seats with me. Beth wants to talk to you!",
I say to Hank a few rows back. "Really? Hey, what do you think my
chances are?", he replies.  I look at him with a straight face and
say, "Well, considering your girlfriend is coming to the airport to
pick you up and her boyfriend is coming to pick her up, if you don't
do her on the plane, 0%."  I was laughing inside. You need some more
sleep Hank!! But anyway, he went up front and had a nice time chatting
with her through the remainder of the trip while I dozed like a baby. 

LMR
--
Las Vegas Strip Club Review
http://members.aol.com/vegasscr